Adam is now over 5 months old and continues to amuse and entertain us on a regular basis. Since I last posted, he's grown considerably (over 18 pounds), adjusted to a daycare routine, learned to roll, learned to sit unattended, learned to grasp objects (including my hair and hoop earrings), and learned that bedtime is 7:30 rather than 11:30. He still doesn't sleep through the night, but that's mostly my fault for not being more vigilant about enforcing the rules. He has a very good-natured personality and is typically either smiling or laughing, and he's as cute as a button. (I might be biased, but total strangers have stopped me to tell me how cute he is, so I can't be totally wrong, can I?) He loves it when people talk to him, whether it's the 17-year-old cashier at SuperAmerica or the 60-year-old mechanic at Saturn (he's not picky). He also loves it when we sing to him (even off-key). He's not afraid of new people and has yet to cry when I've handed him over to an unfamiliar person. Maybe that whole stranger anxiety thing will elude him?
I enjoy being back at work, as much as that makes me sound like a Terrible Mother Who Doesn't Love Her Son. The overwhelming majority of new moms must dread returning to the working world, based on the comments I received upon my return, "How ARE you? Was it just tearing you up inside to drop him off at daycare? Are you sure you're doing OK?" Don't get me wrong, I missed the little guy, but it was also a relief returning to the Land of Adult Conversations, and it felt good returning to a schedule I knew and liked: deadlines and meetings and word counts and lunches with friends and colleagues and interviews with clients and writing stories - things I know I'm good at, things that give me a sense of accomplishment - rather than a schedule consisting of breastfeeding, naps, cooking, cleaning, and trying to fill the time with mostly productive activities (I confess, we did watch "What Not to Wear" and "Oprah" on a regular basis) When Aaron returned home from work at 6 p.m. it felt like the heavens opened. Part of the problem is that I don't do well with excessive amounts of "alone" time; part of the problem is that I felt like I always had to entertain Wee One; part of the problem was that I felt guilty ever setting him down. I even brought him into the bathroom with me.
I have girlfriends who love being stay-at-home moms, and I have nothing but utmost respect for them (it's the hardest job I've ever had), but it's not my gig. Maybe someday I'll have the luxury of working part-time. Until then, I'll try to make the best of the arrangement. Until then, I'll look into those big blue eyes, pinch those chubby cheeks, and kiss those sweet little lips and wonder how such a beautiful, perfect specimen is ours. This past year I fell deeper in love with Aaron (he's an amazing hands-on daddy) and head over heels with a little boy named Adam. I am truly blessed.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Expanding into a trio
Adam is now 8 weeks old and weighs a whopping 13 lbs. 3 oz., putting him in the 90th percentile for his age. Too soon to tell if he'll be a quarterback or captain of the chess team, but for now the extra weight is adorable, with most of it concentrated in his cheeks (the ones on his face, not below the belt, in case you were picturing a J-Lo baby with junk in the trunk.)
I never get tired of looking at him and talking to him and taking him for walks and reading him books and singing him songs, and even with nearly two months of 24-7 bonding time, it still seems surreal that he's my son!! I can't get enough of him ... who would've thought I'd become such a baby person (me, the girl who used to have to be seated before holding a newborn so I wouldn't "break" him/her)?? I guess it's true what my mom always said, it's different when the baby is your own. Something almost primal kicks in and you just figure it out.
It's been more difficult than I thought adjusting to the "new normal" ... sleep deprivation, weekends consisting of baby-friendly activities (I haven't had a beer in a bar since November of last year!), and feeling a little isolated and lonely those first few weeks at home. I missed adult conversations and feeling a sense of accomplishment after a particularly busy work day and spur-of-the-moment happy hours and making plans without worrying about breastfeeding or the possibility of a fussy baby experiencing a meltdown in public. It took awhile for me to feel comfortable enough to leave the house and enter the "real world" again, but WOW has it made a world of difference. Go figure that I'm enjoying my maternity leave now, four weeks before I go back to work.
I never get tired of looking at him and talking to him and taking him for walks and reading him books and singing him songs, and even with nearly two months of 24-7 bonding time, it still seems surreal that he's my son!! I can't get enough of him ... who would've thought I'd become such a baby person (me, the girl who used to have to be seated before holding a newborn so I wouldn't "break" him/her)?? I guess it's true what my mom always said, it's different when the baby is your own. Something almost primal kicks in and you just figure it out.
It's been more difficult than I thought adjusting to the "new normal" ... sleep deprivation, weekends consisting of baby-friendly activities (I haven't had a beer in a bar since November of last year!), and feeling a little isolated and lonely those first few weeks at home. I missed adult conversations and feeling a sense of accomplishment after a particularly busy work day and spur-of-the-moment happy hours and making plans without worrying about breastfeeding or the possibility of a fussy baby experiencing a meltdown in public. It took awhile for me to feel comfortable enough to leave the house and enter the "real world" again, but WOW has it made a world of difference. Go figure that I'm enjoying my maternity leave now, four weeks before I go back to work.
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